My Enablers (Teens these Days!)

     My children are old enough now to be enablers. It’s great! (Shout out to Lindsay Lohan's mother.) 

     I've trained my son to bring home rootbeer for me from his job. And it takes practically no convincing whatsoever whenever I ask either of my teens to walk (or drive) to the convenience store and buy ice-cream-on-a-stick. To them, these so called “errands” are definitely not chores. They love spending my money and they also appreciate the opportunity to take their own money (more money I gave them because they never return the change) and buy their own "necessities." Although it's expensive, it’s so convenient! (These are the milestones they never mention in parenting books.)

     There’s only one problem.

     Someone taught them the meaning of hypocrisy.

     Curses!

     My devious teens are often quite skilled at correctly identifying when I’m manipulating them for my own selfish wants. And they also know what would happen if their mother knew. Um, let’s just say that kind of disclosure would be problematic. So call it extortion. Or call it blackmail. But I say, call them brats for threatening to tell their mother about our little “arrangement.”

     But I can play games too. I know their threats are empty because if they spoil the secret, they too will be prevented from ice-cream-on-a-stick and various other treats and indulgences. MUAHAHAHAHAHA right back at you my own little extortionist teen gang! How's Velma going to solve this my little Shaggies?!

     (Who teaches kids to be so devious anyway?)