And then Autumn.

Go ahead Autumn:
fall.

Slip, flutter, plummet, tumble, dive.
Whichever.

Let leaves leave.

I choose adapt. I choose cope. I choose thanks. Because a starting over is still a starting.

Bring wind. Bring calm. Bring change. Replace past with present. (But let me miss the past a little while too.)

And then Autumn:
rise.

Lessons

source

My Dad would be in his late 70s now. I can’t imagine how grumpy he'd be. On a scale of irritated to livid, he was all of them some days in those last several years. (As I age, I aim to avoid grumpy old fart syndrome.) Despite this, there have been times in this last decade when I missed him like a little kid. Which is odd, because as a little kid, I never missed him. He was always working. It’s just the way it was. I saw him at supper time. Sometimes. Occasionally, we would watch TV together. Mostly though, I watched TV while he slept. In my teen years he would take me for a drive. I’m fairly certain now that he was trying to fix something about me because we were absolutely and completely different in almost every way. Plus, I was nothing like his other sons. It worried him. I enjoyed those drives though. And depending on my mood, I learned to do two things: either jack up his blood pressure by broaching taboo topics or just nod so as to avoid disappointing him so much.

In my adult years I learned the mature thing was to steer the subject away from the grumpy stuff. It didn’t always work. Eventually, certain topics were totally banned:

a.       politics

b.      politicians

c.       political ideology

d.      various Fords that had betrayed him.

Not long before he died he and I installed a screen door together and when we finished he said, "There. Now we can quit fighting." That surprised me. Where did he get that idea? We weren't fighting; we were just disagreeing. After thinking about it for a while I realized the truth but I didn’t have the heart to tell him: he was mostly fighting with himself. Despite grumpy periods, my Dad taught me things I still think about and I’m certain he would find it silly and unfortunate which things actually stuck with me:

• Pepper puts hair on your chest. So does sauerkraut.
• If you pick your nose and eat it, flies will grow in your stomach. (My favourite.)
• Women should not be skinny.
• Travel.
• Fly.
• If it’s truly a good Western, at some point a woman should punch a man.
• You don’t need a drink.
• You're not as good as your brothers. 
• A brand new vehicle is probably a waste of money.
• Insurance is a scam.
• Don’t be mean to girls.
• Driving fast is worth the risk.
• Some people don’t pay their bills but you always will.
• Give your kids whatever they want.
• Never let go of your fishing rod.
• Help your neighbours, even the ones who are idiots.
• Hard work is all there is.

At least for some of these lessons, thank you Dad. 

Things one should outgrow:

fretting about birthdays.

One of my friends turned 50 last week. I watched him interact with all his friends and family; he shared his vodka, ate some cake, played with his granddaughter, told some stories, laughed a lot.

Getting old? So what? No whining. No grumping. Put your mouth guard in a cup with some cleaner, adjust your attitude, and carry on.

"There is no old age. There is, as there always was, just you." ~Carol Matthau

Things one should never outgrow:

"Nature is new every morning." -unknown

the possibility that comes with each new day, every little fascinating surprise.

Just so you know, the answer is no.

Thanks Mac (& his boss). 

Is there a person on Earth who doesn't secretly want a bobcat?

I like to call them bobcans because let's be honest, there's nothing a bobcan't do. Sorry.

Things I need a bobcat for (in order):
- photo shoots
- dog poop in parks
- floats
- cruising
- things I can't reach
- so I can wear my work boots
- photobombing
- tossing really big rocks
- landscaping
- bobcat-ing stuff

Just so you know, the answer is no.

"Happiness is absorption." T.E. Lawrence

Can the world do without your art?

Things that deserve the stink-eye:

Shook: (noun) emotionally or physically
disturbed; deeply upset. See above. 

being incapable of going on.

It matters not where it drops whether 5, 10, 638 seconds, whatever; shake off that feeling of powerlessness, pick up your ice cream, and carry on as before!

Aka life.

Things one should never outgrow:

Grandma & Teresa. 

our elders.

I admire and respect those who care for people who can no longer care for themselves. It confuses me when others neglect their grandparents and other elders. We are all busy. Yet everything we have is, in some way or another, a gift from before.

Things the deserve the stink-eye:

Thanks neighbours from Nova Scotia!
(And shout out to the Atlantic Ocean too.)

Sure. They're tasty. But ugly. Like nightmare inducing ugly. Ditto lobster. Ditto octopus. Ditto head cheese. Whoa. My brain just combined all these into crab-lobster-octopus head cheese. Sorry.

Letter of Appreciation, Kinda

Dear Parents caring for other people’s adult children:

As you know, many parents have young adults who return home for summer. And yet, we rarely see them. Instead (whether you like it or not) you do.

Firstly, thank you. For feeding them. For cleaning up after them. For loaning them a couch. Speaking of surrogate-type parenting, thanks also to their employers. University/College is expensive and we are grateful they have these jobs. Plus we suspect that you employers are also good guides and mentors. However, unlike you, we cannot pay them to hang out with us (or at least we’d prefer not to).  Thus we are stuck with those rare sightings when they randomly return to shower, or drop off their laundry, recharge something, and then there was that one time when we made bacon and they suddenly appeared.

Sigh. Related to this, my wife and I request a small favour and we thank you in advance. Since you are more likely to encounter our kids, please share any or all of the following questions/reminders whenever you deem it appropriate:

1.  Hey you. I heard you have parents.

2.  And I know for a fact they have Wi-Fi.  

3.  Your parents want to know: what are your thoughts on

a.       Current events?

b.      That latest movies?

c.       Pluto’s adorable heart?

d.      Cheese? (All of the above, pretty much anything, they’re open.)

4.  If they cooked more bacon, would you go home?

5.  Would blackmail work? Because let’s be honest, they know A LOT about your past.

6.  Is another tattoo/piercing really necessary? (Throwing this in there, just in case.)

7.   I’m pretty sure tomorrow is Fathers/Mothers/Parents/Hug-Someone-Who-Shares-Your-DNA/Family Guilt Day.

8.  If a parent texts you in the forest, does it make a sound argument not to text back?

9.  Here’s a picture of your Mother weeping. 

10.  Get out.