Friday, July 18, 2014

Some Give.

Door's wide open.
“Giving in is not the same as giving up.”

Think about that. Like me, it may help you sort something out.

I interpret these phrases several ways.
      1.Giving in is to compromise or surrender.
      2.Giving up is to abandon or to release.

I know, I know. Some might say we should never give up. But is giving up always negative?

Giving in is a way to continue momentum in another direction. Giving up is a way to discontinue momentum. And yet sometimes giving up might also lead to a new solution, a new outlook, a new path. Depending on the situation, I see value in both reactions.

For example, one lesson I learned early was to give up my need to be right. Marriage teaches this to us all doesn't it? However, as the youngest in my family I developed this essential skill fairly early, just to manage conflict during my youth. Yet beyond family, it taught me well in life that giving in, compromising, is a way to forge relationships and build bridges. And I am proud to say that I try to seek to learn something from everyone regardless of gender, education, age, religion, culture, past or present, whatever. This learning inspires me; the listening does too. So do great leaders. I feel this has helped me determine what I agree with and what I don’t. In this sense, giving in and giving up has given me so much more.

But there’s another lesson I still haven’t mastered yet: give up focusing on what’s wrong instead of what’s right. This lesson can make all the difference in moving forward and achieving happiness. Why? Give in or give up; either way, something will give. 


Chicken said...

Thoughtful post, DBS. I agree with you and especially like the part about giving in encouraging moving forward and giving up halting it. Tonight I was out walking, mind wandering, and I had the thought that all of the people have helped me in life, propelled me forward, taken a chance, have been people with open hearts and minds. Sometimes they are really extraverted and you can't help but find them, they attract people like moths to flame, and other times they are quiet and thoughtful, possibly even grumpy, but cognizant. My goal is to be one of those people. I suspect you already are.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Anything stated in the absolute is problematic. "Never give up." Sometimes that's just wrong and giving up is the best thing you can do. The trick is knowing when to do it and when not to. "Aye, there's the rub" as somebody or another said in some Shakespearian play or another. Which one? Who knows? I give up.

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