Saturday, January 15, 2011

Wordfuse

procrastiknave (noun): procrastinator + knave = the tricky enabler in our lives who grants us permission, perhaps even encourages us to defer, postpone, or play hooky from something important that we should be otherwise doing. This person's intentions could be straightforward or duplicitous. For example, the procrastiknave might actually have good intentions (unlikely) or attempt to exploit our general weaknesses and inability to concentrate by using any of the following remarks: 

  • "Don't work so hard." 
  • "You look stressed. I'm sure you'd feel better if you took a break and got some exercise by shoveling the snow in the driveway."
  • *yells from the other room* "I'm naked!" (Yup, this is wishful thinking; sadly, spouses/partners are rarely long-term procrastiknaves.)

Most frequently, we ourselves act as our own personal procrastiknaves. These little buggers live inside the right hemisphere of the human brain, aka the side stimulated by things that sparkle or a really good song or even an appalling rerun of Toddlers & Tiaras. Yup, I suspect the entire internet was created by procrastiknaves. My inner procrastiknave has kept me busy ALL afternoon making wordfuses, watching MadTV and playing with one of these


*One might refer to those who do not realize they are being manipulated by a procrastiknave as "procrastinaive."

23 comments:

Simple Dude said...

I get struck by the procrastiknave far too often. For instance to do list today had a ton of items but it's been completely pushed to tomorrow. That's why there are two days in a weekend right?

SD
http://simpledudecomplexworld.blogspot.com/

Alistair said...

If you have a predisposition for this would it be your procastinature???

Artist and Geek said...

:) "entire internet" so true.
You, dbs are a procrastiknaveinducer. Cause now you reminded me that I haven't played with my wooden model for a while.

Alittlesprite said...

My husband is one of these, although I am the one who yells out "I'm Naked!". Strangly enough he never objects.

Chelle said...

The internet is a procrastiknave. For real, try asking twitter if you should (insert fun activity) instead of (shores, work activity).

Mrs4444 said...

This is awesome. I definitely have a procrastiknave that lives beneath my desk at work. I hate it--I get nothing accomplished until 3:15! grrrr

Nicole said...

I love that you threw "procrastinaive" in there at the end.

The Hubster and I take turns playing the procrastiknave. We are never the procrastinaive. Purposeful derailment of each others productivity. Yep, like a good sporting match.

paulsifer42 said...

I must make a confession... I am a procrastiknave. My lovely wife tries to get so much done, and it is me who says, "Oh, it can wait until tomorrow can't it?" Now that I've admitted to it I'll go sit in my corner. I'm really sorry.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Great portmanteau word!

Sarah Walton said...

As a fellow procrastiknave, I object to you referring to our intentions as unlikely to be good. My intentions are always good - I will stop you doing something that makes you unhappy and go and get you drunk.

Really, everybody is better off...

baygirl32 said...

I can't wait for your dictionary to reach a store near me (love it)

Didactic Pirate said...

Facebook? Twitter? Both invented by procrastiknaves.

dbs said...

@SD Works for me.
@Alistair Smart. Good one.
@A&G Damn Ikea.
@alittlesprite Ha!
@Chelle Good example. I'm afraid to try that.
@Mrs4444 Yes, I frequently find them at work too.
@Nicole It sounds like a good system.
@paulsifer42 Naughtychair!
@DSWS Thank you.
@Sarah Walton Ha! I like it.
@baygirl32 Sounds sweet to me. Thank you for saying that.
@DP Most def.

Missy said...

I am thinking this is actually a medical condition!!!!

dbs said...

@Missy Ha! You might be right.

Dreamer said...

Ha ha. I used to be procrastinaive. My ex, the procrastiknave:
"Pssshhh college? Just stay in bed and get stoned with me..."

If I do ever speak to him again, Stoner Procrastiknave will be his name. Thanks, this has made me feel very good.

dbs said...

@Dreamer I'm glad.

Mrs. Tuna said...

I am definetly dilly dallying on doing my first reading assignment but surfing blogs.

Artist and Geek said...

dbs-clever.

wendy said...

I think I need to get a note pad and write all these down.
perhaps later....(tee,hee)

Sally - My Custard Pie said...

You've cracked it! The entire internet is all down to procrastinknaves.

Kev D. said...

I think my wife is the rare long termer...

And I of course, act as her SUPREME PROCRASTIKNAVE.

dbs said...

@MrsTuna Get back to work. I read your blog about how much you have to accomplish. Stay focused.
@wendy Clever.
@Sally I believe so.
@KevD Lucky man.

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