Monday, May 9, 2011

Necessary.

Seeds hide orchards.
Sometimes random and shocking and hurtful things just seem to happen. And those events seem so pointless and overwhelming and frustrating. Mother's Day last year was awful. For my wife and for me. I couldn't even write about it. And I still can't. Not yet. It doesn't matter anyway; it's not the point of this. We've all had heartbreaking experiences. Sometimes what can we do but cry?

And then a year goes by.

This Mother's Day was much different. I planted a tree. It was not intended to be symbolic. It had nothing to do with my Mom or my wife or with anything really. Our Mayday was dying. I knew I had to remove it but, maybe we could save it somehow? For the past ten years, that tree would typically bud close to my daughter's birthday in April and flower by my son's birthday in May. That tree meant something to me. And everything in life is supposed to mean something, isn't it?

But my son and I cut it down, chopped out the roots with an axe. It was all so violent. And I realize now, necessary.

Just like last year. Necessary.

19 comments:

Alittlesprite said...

I'm sorry you went through such a hard time last year (HUGS).

I understand about the tree. :(

Alittlesprite said...

I linked my post to this one. Hope you don't mind.

dbs said...

Thanks Sprite. I don't mind at all. And I know you understand all of this more than even I do.

SherilinR said...

those necessary cuttings are the worst. it feels like you're hurting yourself at the time, but the long run shows the rightness.

Oilfield Trash said...

Sometimes you have to do that, after all it is the circle of life.

Perhaps a new tree is in order?

karensomethingorother said...

oh, I hear you about the painful year.

Elly Lou said...

Oh this made my throat tight with tears. *hugs*

Vinny C said...

I agree with Sherilin. Some of life's decisions are painful but necessary. Sometimes they don't seem fair but hopefully, if we wait long enough, we find some kind of meaning to it.

paulsifer42 said...

Hey, got an award for you over at my place.

Nubian said...

Very powerful post today. My husband and I went through a 'cutting and removing' time a few years ago... still stings a little but sometimes we have to cut out the bad to allow for the good to grow.

paulsifer42 said...

I totally know what you mean about things 'meaning' something. Outside of our condos there are some trees that only blossom for two or three weeks a year. So much about them makes me think of people, and God, and life in general. I don't know how I'd deal with them being chopped down. Sorry about it.

Antares Cryptos said...

Sometimes what grows after grows stronger.

Nicki said...

This moved me.

Michael said...

I love symbols and metaphors. The language of the unspoken.

dbs said...

@SherilinR True.
@OT You're right.
@karen Some years eh?
@EllyLou Sorry. I hope it was cathartic though.
@VinnyC Well said.
@Nubian "Cutting and removing" is a very good way to describe it.
@paul We all learn to deal.
@AC Yes. Well said.
@Nicki Sometimes we need to hear something that we didn't know we needed to hear.
@Michael Me too.

Title Loans said...

I get it about the tree, too. Similar things happened three years ago with us, and there coincidentally was a tree issue, too. Now in the place, though is a beautiful new tree, which gives me a little bit of hope every day. :)
Ava

Ryan said...

Powerful post, painful but necessary.

Mrs4444 said...

This is brilliant. I understand.

Emily said...

I thought of my Mother's Day as a mix of good, bad and ugly, with some moments of joy fit in.

I guess you could say that about most of life, can't you?

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...