10/31

Links to 9/31 &
the 31 Things Launch Post

If you also live in North American, a happy Mother's Day. 

My mother died more than a decade ago. I've rarely written about her, but when I do it's a curated approach. 

Since today is dedicated to mothers, it occurred to me to write about her, but what vibrant thing, what meaningful object would best represent my mother? What do I even possess that belonged to my mother? 

My mother was a mystery to me. I'm not sure if I ever really knew her? Oh sure, I can describe her well, but her identity? She remains elusive. 

My aim here is curiosity, not disrespect; I have emptied myself of past bitterness. Many (most?) parent-child relationships are complicated, sometimes forever uneasy. Parents often do not share their inner lives with their children, at least not deliberately. Who am I to judge? 

My wife and I were in a greenhouse this weekend and she asked, "what's this beautiful flower?" I explained they were dahlias, known for their vibrant colours, impressive symmetry, and lengthy summer blooming. I added that although they are not perennials (in our climate), the bulbs can be stored inside in the winter, then replanted to regrow each Spring. But then something occurred to me...why did she ask me? How did I know this? 

Because my Mom taught me. Her favourite thing was the outdoors: the garden, the trees, the veggies, the flowers, the bees... is this why the trees and grains and flowers fascinate me endlessly? We may have never developed a deeper language between us, but we could speak flowers. That's something.