 |
| I, M, & L |
Like my grandson in this pic, I grew up with cousins, two girls close to my age, one older and one younger.
Gen X kids, we mostly raised ourselves. It wasn't easy. We knew how to fend for ourselves and how to disappear, but we filled our hiding places with music and candy and pretend and stories but mostly laughter, that sort of laughter that makes breathing sporadic. (You'd understand what was so funny if you watched us perform The Most Beautiful Girl in the World in a freezing cold unfinished basement for an audience of one bored and one bewildered cat.)
With much to learn and no one safe to ask, we figured life out together, without judgment or shame—so relieving for a group of offbeat oddballs. Uncertain about ourselves, but relying on each other, our promises were kept: we crossed our hearts and hoped to die. We forgave each other's mistakes, all of them, I hope? Throughout childhood, there were few people I trusted more than those two.
Inevitably, life led us in different directions. I miss them. I'm grateful for the cushion we constructed between ourselves and the world, and so of course I will foster this bond in I, in M, in L. And perhaps someday, fingers and toes crossed, my cousins and I will spend an entire sunrise to sunset with each other again. And since we no longer have to sneak whiskey shots, perhaps karaoke? 〵(⌒˽⌒)〴
Dear friends, did you grow up with cousins?
11 comments:
What a pleasant and thoughtful post. I was an 'only' and pretty well separated by distance from whatever cousins that I had. What a small family we are, even both kids are divorced, and we only have two grands. Sue has one estranged sister, one deceased brother, and the sister that she is close to is also divorced. Oh, and the daughter of the estranged sister is also estranged from both her mother and Sue.
I had 36 first cousins and a bunch of second cousins as well. But they were scattered across 3 provinces and I rarely saw them, except for a handful. None of them lived in my town or nearby to be an actual part of my growing up. Can't say I would have changed that.
Awesome and thought-provoking post. Although I did see a couple of my cousins once in a while, we no longer keep in touch. Haven't for decades. Then there are the cousins I have never met.
I do hope that cousins Lily and Kendall stay friends for life and are there to support each other.
I had SO many cousins - just counting them up now, I get to at least 51 and I may have missed some. But the only ones my age lived "away". We were good friends during their summer trips "home", and later in life I became very close to one I hadn't known in childhood. But not the scenario you describe, which sounds like a trio that should be resurrected again - soon, before it's too late. I'm glad you are encouraging your grandkids to be together. Being related can make an especially strong friend bond, and the grownups have to help make the circumstances to allow it to flourish. Good job, Grampy/Grandad or however you are addressed :)
Nice post. I had a few cousins but we didn't see them very often. They lived far from us and now we have no idea where they live.
So many great memories. My kids hear many stories of us growing up. So thankful to have all the memories of our childhood.
Sadly I grew up without cousins. I was one of the youngest cousins born, twenty years between the first and last, and the cousins were scattered about in England and BC. I keep in touch with two now but it would have been wonderful to have had them in my life earlier.
For me it was all rather sad. My mother had four sons and her brother had five daughters. They only lived seventy five miles away to the north of Manchester but I didn't meet them until I was sixty. A rift had occurred in 1947 when my father lent Uncle Derek £50 but he did not pay it back as agreed. At sixty it was too late to make that special cousin bond that you enjoyed.
Codex: Are you okay?
Yes, thanks for asking. Hopefully today's post explains. I hope you're ok too.
Cousins have been one of my life’s greatest gifts, and I am gratified beyond words that my children have grown up close to theirs too. My mother and her eight siblings actively fostered this bond. We do not take it for granted. I understand so fully the camaraderie and sense of utter safety and joy you describe. I hope your cousins see this post.
Post a Comment