Sunday, April 18, 2010

An Open Letter

Dear  Hormonal & Drunk Teenaged Boys Idiots,

Don't call my house at 3:05 a.m. because you want to talk to my daughter. Grow up. Have some respect.

Sincerely With hate I look forward to never hearing from you again,

her Dad

10 comments:

t i m said...

I used to be one of those boys in my younger days until one mother chastised me amongst a litany of threats. I somehow lived to tell the tale. :)

Chelle said...

Ruh Roooh. This is why you should be teaching at her high school. Extra scary Dadness factor. At least circle the parking lot.

dbs said...

I like your suggestion a lot and I will raise you one other: remember that station wagon that the psycho drives in the original Halloween? It had a psychiatric hospital decal on the side I think. I will order an exact replica and circle the parking with that displayed on my door. This will probably send a stronger message than the taser photo.

Keet said...

I like the taser photo too tho'... I mean you could drive around with a blowdryer disguised as a taser. for extra scary factor, of course. I mean it might just add "crazy" factor, but both can be effective against hormonal idiots.

Chelle said...

Also, I can lend you a WWII bulletproof camo helmet. Maybe get a megaphone to utter threats with while everyone is in class. The bigger the scene, the more free publicity.

It's a small town, all you need to do is throw one cat at one teenager and everyone will get the message.

Keet said...

Cat Throwing? C'mon michelle. I thought you had bigger balls than that. You need to throw MANY kittens. They have the razor sharp claws, remember? If you show up with a box of kittens they won't suspect a thing. until you start tossing those scratch bombs around.... then they'll know. They'll know. Don't mess with Stew.

dbs said...

Keet & Chelle--Kitten tossing? It's genius. Although I have never heard of this method as a sort of molotov cocktail, I am actively scanning the classifieds for kittens. (Just don't tell PETA.) And I'm getting a megaphone too and I might just find out if Sue Sylvester from Glee is available. Wait 'til I throw her at those drunken teen boys.

Jen said...

exactly!

Emily said...

I guess they all don't have their own iPhones? Seriously that is outrageous!

dbs said...

@Jen I second that.
@Emily The phone had been taken away. Apparently that doesn't deter some idiot teenaged boys. Grrr.

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