Friday, August 9, 2013

Things I've decided about technology:


      1.  I’m done with passwords. DONE. “Your password must be 68 characters in length and must include two numbers, punctuation, alternating upper and lower case, the capital of South Korea and the name of the least favourite pet of your first crush.”

      2.  My wireless printer wanted a password the other day and I actually knew it (mostly because it was a variation on the same password I use for everything and let’s be honest, this is what everyone is doing). However, I needed to enter a number and the keypad on the printer would only enter letters so then I spent fifteen minutes searching for the printer’s manual hoping that somehow a unicorn would just magically deliver it to my front door because I had absolutely no idea where it was. That didn’t work so I began randomly hammering the keypad with my fingers and somehow numbers appeared and suddenly I could enter the password correctly. “Connected.” How does this relate to decisions? Well. I’ve decided that printers shouldn’t require passwords. I mean, c’mon, who would park in front of my house and use my wi-fi code to send 800 copies to my printer? (Warning: if anyone is indeed planning something so nefarious, be aware that usually there’s no paper in my printer. Or ink.)

3.      Whoa. That was a lot of bitter rambling, wasn’t it? New decision: I need to suck it up about passwords. At first I salivated pondering that some Steve Jobs type must be working on making passwords obsolete, some new system that rids us of this annoyance, some new app to make our lives easier (or enslave us depending on how you look at it), and then with a little heart-thud I realized that hopefully there’s someone incredibly smart and creative working on curing cancer instead. Perspective, people, perspective. I need some.

4.      Thus, I am not DONE with passwords; there’s nothing I can do about them.

5.      And all this led me some other thoughts. What if life had a password? And what would it be? The answer? It’s a smile. It’s a “good morning.” It’s a hello. It’s a nod. It’s a wave. It’s acknowledging other people. It’s respect. Now there’s a decision.

In conclusion I am reminded that there are plenty of great things in life that don’t get screwed up by security codes. Really good things. Like s’mores with peanut butter cups. No password required. 

8 comments:

Adam said...

I imagine in a decade or two, we'll just have a fingerprint scanner

Laoch of Chicago said...

I sometimes use paraphrases which seem reasonably robust but also not that hard to remember.

Antares Cryptos said...

@Laoch *smacks forehead*

Debra She Who Seeks said...

"The name of the least favourite pet of your first crush" -- hahahahahaha, good one!

Jon Hunt said...

You might like to take a look at http://www.lastpass.com

Vinny C said...

Alas, there are certain passwords that exist outside of technology as well. Like the one men must often use with their lady friends to unlock certain pre-bedtime activity. I find these can be exceptionally difficult to decipher as they have a tendency of changing randomly and you only have one attempt allowed before total system shutdown.

Al Penwasser said...

I'd like to be able to press CTL-ALT-DEL when people get on my nerves. It's a dream I have.

manders said...

ugh, i HATE passwords. and i hate that i have to constantly change them on all my various systems at work every 3 months. and i can't use anything i used - or is similar to anything i used - in the past 12 passwords. I DON'T HAVE THAT MUCH CREATIVITY!!

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