Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Wordfuse (Run-on-Sentence Edition)

spar + party = sparty (noun): aka the staff/office holiday party (or really, any party) where there's a decent vibe dangerously mixed with people who are forced to spend way too much time together and then someone gets snippy (or "snipsy" [snippy + tipsy]) during charades and maybe someone's frank remark levels the office scapegoat who shared yet another inside thought leading to a tipping point and then Group A starts stabbing Group B with their eyes and a minor awkward quarrel erupts and somehow even the music seems quieter but someone (me) diffuses the whole thing by whistling the theme to The Good, the Bad and the Ugly and then laughter erupts and for the next hour someone (me) whistles that tune at perfect moments until it gets kind of old but it still feels like the whole conflict would barely be mentioned in parenthesis until a sequel premieres and another awkward moment ensues but then the guy who never gets drunk puts on sunglasses and suddenly starts rapping Pitbull and once the laughter dies down there's a debate about how old Pitbull is (isn't he too old to be doing that?) and someone has to google him on the phone and drunk Pitbull-wannabe starts being all old rapper guy and someone with a self-diagnosed big bum offers to be J-Lo and someone else pretends to be Marc Anthony and they have a fake argument over the twins and people are laughing with abandon again but meanwhile a couple of people feel they're being mocked and have consequently left in a huff but no one noticed until later and after the weekend everyone remarks on the good party but secretly gossips about the truth: it was more of a sparty than a party. Add this to exacerbate the situation.

15 comments:

Nicole said...

*slow clap* bravo!

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Gawd, office parties. Don't you hate them?

Kev D. said...

Laugh out loud, followed by a single clap.

I hate when there's assigned seating at office parties, and you end up sitting next to random people that you never talk to... making it an UNCOMFOR-TABLE.

BAM. Wordfuse.

Also, I'm still around, just been posting on my zombie blog.

http://zombiehall.blogspot.com/

BUT, I have been writing again for HXR and will start posting again rather soon. I PROMISE!!

As always, thanks for the "where you been", and the awesome stuff you write.

Rubye Jack said...

The last place I worked, the parties were always at a local bar and the director was always the first one tipsy, while nursing her 2-year old at the same time. Talk about gossip.
Oh yes, I worked for a group of psychotherapists at that. :)

Sub-Radar-Mike said...

Haha, sounds like quite the comedy of events... the image in my head of the old Pitbull wannabe made me chuckle.

karensomethingorother said...

I haven't been to an office party in eons, but alcohol plus office people creates weirdness, no?

Oh, I didn't reply to your last post, because I'm still trying to think if there are any "great" people nowadays. I was pondering this in bed this morning before I got up.

Pickleope said...

Wow, that was like a whole play you laid out. Very good. Never had an uncomfortable holiday party experience, but after this, I feel like I have.

Alistair said...

The first place I managed the Christmas party always ended in a brawl - it was a tradition that began way before I got there.

I used to go have a drink, put some cash in the kitty and leave.....

{most of the time anyway}

Munk said...

T'was a fine read, leaving Munk quite gruntled.

Alittlesprite said...

I've only ever been to one office party.. and it was something like this...

...I left early..lol

Al Penwasser said...

Snipsy! That's great!

Angelina said...

Right on! Now that is a party!!! Too bad I didn't hear about it while I was in Alberta I would have made an effort to attend for the entertainment alone.

G said...

I've been snipsy at many a party

Vinny C said...

Haven't been to a good office party in a loooong time. Last one I went to was when I was in banking.

Bankers are really boring.

Antares Cryptos said...

Yours sound better than the ones I haven't been to.

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