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Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Wordfuse (a Top Ten List)

glumped (adjective): glum + pumped = the quality of anticipating enjoyment at potentially indulging in depressing experiences.


Top ten signs you're glumped:
  1. You enjoy paying off your credit cards.
  2. You like to youtube it up with Martina McBride's Concrete Angel or perhaps you appreciate this song. (If you make it through this bizarre video in its entirety then you are likely third-degree glumped).
  3. Each morning you look forward to your job cleaning porta-potties. (I thank you because someone has to do it.)
  4. You can't wait to get to the grocery store to buy a hefty bag of chips and the family-sized dill-pickle dip container just 'cause it's a Friday night.
  5. Your favourite SNL character is Debbie Downer. *this sound effect makes you painfully giddy*
  6. You rewind that moment in Toy Story when Buzz Lightyear discovers he's actually a toy.
  7. You have actually heard of this upcoming holiday.
  8. You sometimes google Tammy Faye Bakker.
  9. You LOVE it when Oprah talks about "the ugly cry."
  10. You found this post even mildly inspiring. 

13 comments:

Alittlesprite said...

"Singles Awareness Day"? BAHAHAAA!!
I know Hubby loves to do #1. I think he goes into heart failure(lol) every time we have to use the fantastic plastic. (Just today we had to put $600 on it for new glasses and sunglasses for me :)

Vinny C said...

First: one minute, three seconds!!! That's all of that song I could take before dark, dark thoughts started to creep in.

Second: I prefer cheese dip on my Friday nights.

That is all.

Mrs. Tuna said...

I always find your posts inspiring.

Kev D. said...

I'm a glumpy ass dude, it would seem... haha...

Artist and Geek said...

I don't get it.

Unknown said...

Number 4 would be perfect but you forgot the case of Oreos AND the box of wine...clearly, that was a clerical error.

You thinks it's easy building this glumpy butt of mine?

The Defiant Marshmallow said...

Oh, no! I'm glumped! #s 7 and 8 sank me!

DB Stewart said...

@alittlesprite It's painful isn't it?
@VinnyC Cheese dip works too.
@Mrs.Tuna Are you being sarcastic because I'm onto your witty, clever ways...
@KevD Ditto.
@A&G Ha. You wouldn't!
@Nari I apologize and you are correct.
@DM You made it quite far down the list.

wendy said...

you are brilliant....should compose your own dictionary.
I like Tammy Faye Bakkers eyelashes!!
I am familiar with the "ugly cry" and throw in some snot bubbles for effect.
I am pretty glumped when I have to go shovel horse poop. ah, joy

DB Stewart said...

@wendy So good to hear from you. I have shoveled horse poop too and feel your pain.

Nicole Leigh Shaw said...

I live for number 1. Glumped up!

Cheeseboy said...

Ha ha. This is awesome. I feel glumped when I have to take my son to soccer practice sometimes.

michael.offworld said...

I must be glumped right up the ass. My wife laughs at me when I listen to Concrete Angel and sniffle at the end. "Who da man? WHO DA MAN!?" (It's all part of the glumping.)

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